How to Tell Her What You Want
Talking about sex is the thing that makes sex good. Knowing what you want and what she wants out of your hookup is extremely important, so being able to discuss this sort of thing openly and frankly is what will get you in bed with more women than anything else.
The more you talk, the more you’ll get what you want.
Any kinky dating sites that are good will tell you that talking about what you’re into is 99% of the battle. Men and women alike are guilty of not being able to chat openly about what they’re into, and that’s why they end up leading unsatisfying sex lives that don’t get them anywhere.
You don’t want that to happen to you, obviously. That’s why you’re trying to hookup on kinky dating sites that are legit in the first place! While a lot of men have issues outright expressing and communicating kinks that they’ve been holding in for years, that should fly out the window when you realize this is a hookup for fun, and not something that needs to be an end all, be all.
Have fun with it.
The more fun you have talking about sex, the more likely you’re going to have fun in the bedroom, too. These women feel the same way about kinks as you do, and that’s why they’re on these sites, looking for a hookup that has his ducks in a row regarding his kinks.
It doesn’t matter to them if you’re inexperienced or experienced so long as you take the time to tell them either way. If you can laugh about kinks that you aren’t familiar with, it’s just going to make them feel more comfortable, and be more open about talking about things that they aren’t exactly 100% confident in, too.
These women know what you’re there for.
They know that they end game is sex. They WANT the end game to be sex. If it isn’t sex, they’re going to assume they’re a part of some kinky dating site scams, and they’re going to hightail it out of there as fast as you.
While sex shouldn’t be the first thing that the two of you talk about, it shouldn’t be the last, either. Once you two have established the kind of report that you need in order to chat frankly about your kinks, sex should be an exciting part of the conversation.
It’s good to know what you want.
Even if you are interested in being a submissive, you still need to be firm in what you are looking for in a Dominant. You might have scenes that have been fantasies of yours for months, and you want to make sure that your partner will be able to act these sorts of things out properly with you.
It doesn’t matter what sort of kinks you are into so long as you can fully realize and discuss scenes with your potential partner. This kind of discussion should be as in depth as possible, as you two should have all the details ironed out before you actually meet in person.
Talk about preparations.
Once you’ve got the kinks nailed down, you really should be talking about what you need in order to make these sorts of scenes work… and if you and your hookup can actually make it happen.
You should always gauge their reactions carefully. If at any point they seem to be avoidant of an issue, or generally uninterested, you should take the time to ask them if they are really okay with what you are suggesting.
If you find out that they are indeed uncomfortable with your ideas, then the two of you need to discuss the hard and soft limits that the two of you have at length. This will determine whether or not the two of you are fully compatible, because if your main kink is something that your partner considers their hard limit (or something that they simply can’t do), then it is probably time to find someone else to hook up with.
Be wary of those that claim to know everything.
It’s one thing to be experienced. It is something else for your partner to claim that they’ve literally done everything that you’ve suggested, and to be an expert at all of it as well.
While there are many people in the kinky dating world that are extremely experienced, it’s a rare day that you’re going to find someone like that with an interest in all of your exact kinks. To us, that screams scam.
It’s good to know when to stop the conversation.
If at any point you end up feeling pressured by your potential hookup, or feel as if you are being ignored in the conversation, it’s time to step away.
It might be hard to do that when you’re so set on getting a hookup, but seriously – your safety and happiness is worth a lot more. There are a lot of fish in the sea, and with the right kinky dating site, you’re going to find a lot more than one woman that isn’t up for the same stuff that you are, anyway.